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I conducted a confident public speaking workshop in Chicago a couple of weeks and I when I was working on my presentation and it was interesting to me how much I reflected on just how unnatural public speaking really is, for everyone. I am a professional speaker and it is what I do for a living but the reality is, there isn’t a presentation that I do that I don’t feel nervous or a little worried about.

This got me thinking! If I feel nervous and I do this for a living then how difficult it is for people who don’t. Well I thought that in some small way if in this blog I could be completely honest with you about how I feel then maybe in some small way it might be able to offer you a little help & support the next time you speak in public.

Let’s start that everyone is afraid of something when it comes to public speaking. So, what is your biggest fear? While that question might evoke some nervous energy I think it is an important one to answer. You see in order to manage your fears & insecurities you have to know exactly what they are and where they come from.

Let me get the ball rolling by answering that question.

“Susan, what is your biggest fear when it comes to public speaking?”

Funny that you ask that, my biggest fear is that people are going to think that I am stupid. Yes that is my biggest fear. I don’t know if you have looked at my photo but I have been blessed and cursed with blonde hair. While I love being a blonde I am not a big fan of the countless blonde jokes. If anytime a blonde makes a mistake it is like the only thing a person can see is the color of their hair. I don’t want people to see me as some “dumb blonde”. My fear of people thinking I am stupid also comes from my relationship with my big brother. As I share in my Confident Public Speaking Audio Training, I have always tried to prove to my oldest brother Gary that I am more then just his “stupid” little sister.

So why am I telling you all of this? Well it is simple. The more you understand where your fears come from the easier it is to manage it in the moment when that fear is being evoked. An uncomfortable situation like speaking in public puts people face to face with their inner most fears. For me by understanding my fear of looking stupid and where it comes from gives me the ability to mentally support myself when I start feeling that fear. You see, I know that I am not stupid and that this fear or insecurity is just a part of me…it is not all of me.

One of the things that I teach my clients how to do with my coaching and seminars is how to play with their insecurities instead of letting them play with them!! The definition of confidence in my book is that confident people “feel the fear but they do it anyway”. I have been speaking professionally for over a decade but I still have to play with the same fear every time I get up in front of an audience, big or small. Yes I am nervous about my next presentation but I am not going to let my fears keep me from sharing what it is that I know. The more you learn to play with your fears the easier it is to speak with more confidence. You are not your fears!!

Next time you feel the fear, figure out where it comes from and then find a way to feel the fear but do it anyway!

Susan Leahy MA. ABS turns groups into teams through increasing communication, improving meetings and driving results. Susan conducts keynotes, workshops and full day retreat for her clients across the country. Visit Susan at www.SusanLeahy.com for more details about how to turn your group into a TEAM!